“THE MEN OF THE SOUTH WERE PERISHING. FOR MANY CYCLES THEY HAD FALLEN VICTIM TO THE CREATURES OF THE AIR AND THE SEA. THE GREAT EAGLES FROM THE EASTERN RANGES AND THE OCEANMASTERS, LORDS OF ALL SEA-BEASTS, HAD FORCED THE SOUTHERN PEOPLES TO FLEE TOWARDS THE FROZEN NORTHERN WASTES. FEW WHO VENTURED INTO THIS HOSTILE TERRITORY RETURNED, BUT THOSE WHO DID SPOKE OF A PROUD YET SAVAGE WARRIOR RACE TO WHICH THEY OWED THEIR LIVES. COULD THESE ULTIMATE WARRIORS BE THE LAST GREAT HOPE FOR THE REALM OF MEN? LEGEND HAS IT THE SOUTHERNERS CONTINUED TO TRAVEL NORTH TOWARDS THEIR LAST CHANCE FOR HOPE, FREEDOM, REVENGE! THIS IS THE FIRST CHAPTER OF MANKIND’S INTERACTION WITH THE ULTIMATE SLAYMASTER, BUT IT IS BY NO MEANS THE LAST…”
I am not making this up. The above text is the preface of the first track of Ultimate Slaymaster’s debut album. And yes, it is all written in CAPITALS for a purpose. Because Ultimate Slaymaster is on a mission to re-take the world from the Great Eagles and the Oceanmasters, and of course this can only be done by shouting numerous battle hymns, whilst slashing into your enemies with big shiny swords.
Edinburgh based band Ultimate Slaymaster is the side project of members of Vasquez, A Fight You Can’t Win, Mr. Dirty and Flux Valociraptor. This sounds like there are loads of members in Ultimate Slaymaster, but no, it is actually a two-piece band. BASTARD JANGLE-AXE plays bass and shouts and plays drums on a couple of songs, whilst CORNFED HAMMERGLAND drums and occasionally shouts. The latter is also active in 3 of the above mentioned 4 bands.
I have waited for this release with much anticipation for the simple reason that I have seen them live a bunch of times in small, dungeon looking Edinburgh venues. And they were always a lot of fun. But most of all, they were dirty, noisy, very shouty and very sludge/doom. And this is something I just happen to like a lot.
Now we can finally listen to their self-titled debut album and it does not disappoint at all. Being all self-recorded, the production is raw, with loads of heavy distorted bass guitar and plenty, if not only, open hi-hat played battering drums. There is an overall garage-rock feel, with a huge sludge dose poured on top of it. And yes, with a lot of shouting. They even used their own battle choir consisting of MAHATMA GOATWITCH, OBLITERON SHREDDERDACTYL and SVARTUR CAVALIER, SON OF OF LENNÄN to increase the overall strength and power of their battle cries.
There really is not a boring moment on this album. All songs pounce away with blistering riffs and Eagle crushing lyrics, such as “I WILL FIGHT YOU AT EVERY TURN, I WILL NOT LET MY KINGDOM BURN, THE SHARKS AND I WILL NEVER FLEE, THIS WAR DOES NOT END WITHOUT ME” and “GIVE ME A BLADE, I’LL SPREAD YOU ON THE GODDAM WALLS. GIVE ME A BLADE, I WANNA SEE YOUR GODDAM SOUL”
There are a bunch of brilliant instrumental songs (‘BLOODOATH’, ‘A BATTERY OF MAN-MADE SUNS’ and ‘…AND THE SKY WENT DARK, AND THE AIR WAS FILLED WITH THUNDER’), but stand-out tracks for me are definitely ‘KRIMM, THE WARRIOR’, ‘GUTPUNCHER’ (“HEY! WHAT YOU GONNA DO? YEAH! I’LL CUT YOU IN TWO! COME ON! SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT! YEAH! I WILL WATCH YOU ROT…IN HELL!!”) and ‘TEMPLE OF EAGLES’ (“THIS! IS! WHERE! I SAW THEM! FIGHT! KILL! AND FEAST!. ON MY COMRADES!!”). ‘ELEVENELEVENELEVEN’ is Ultimate Slaymaster’s shortest battle hymn, but still skull-crushingly doing the job.
Ultimate Slaymaster loves fantasy and heavy riffing. It all may sound a bit silly, but these guys can definitely play and play very well. They understand the essence of heavy riffs and catchy hooks and with so many bands taking themselves overly serious, Ultimate Slaymaster provides a welcome addition to this doom and dark genre.
Special mention goes to RUTHERFORD WIZARDFISTS for providing some of the best artwork I have ever seen.
Listen to Ultimate Slaymaster here before you put on your armour and start crushing skulls of Great Eagles and Oceanmasters.
Review by Sander van den Driesche.
